Coaching vs. Telling: The Art of Empowering Clients

As personal trainers, we often pride ourselves on being the experts, the ones with the knowledge, the plan, and the answers. But here’s the truth: simply telling clients what to do isn’t enough. If we want to create lasting change, we need to move beyond instruction and embrace the art of coaching. Coaching empowers clients to take ownership of their fitness journey, and that’s where real transformation happens.

 

Coaching vs. Telling - What’s the Difference?

Telling is directive. It’s about giving orders:
“Do 10 reps.”
“Eat this, not that.”
“Don’t skip your session.”

While this approach can deliver short-term compliance, it rarely builds long-term commitment. Clients may follow instructions because you said so, but they don’t necessarily understand why those actions matter. Without that understanding, habits crumble when life gets busy or when you’re not there to guide them.

Coaching, on the other hand, is collaborative. It’s about guiding rather than dictating. Instead of being the sole decision-maker, you become a partner in the process. You ask questions, listen actively, and help clients discover solutions that fit their lifestyle. Coaching fosters autonomy, confidence, and resilience, all qualities that sustain progress far beyond the gym.

 

Why Coaching Matters More Than Ever

Modern clients are savvy. They have access to endless fitness advice online, but what they lack is personalised guidance and accountability. Coaching fills that gap. It transforms the trainer-client relationship from a transactional exchange into a partnership built on trust.

Empowered clients are more motivated, more consistent, and more likely to achieve their goals. They feel involved in the process, which creates a sense of ownership. And when clients own their journey, they stick with it even when challenges arise.

 

The Psychological Side of Coaching

Fitness isn’t just physical; it’s deeply psychological. Many clients struggle with self-doubt, fear of failure, or unrealistic expectations shaped by social media. Telling them what to do doesn’t address these barriers. Coaching does. By asking the right questions and listening without judgement, you help clients uncover what’s holding them back and develop strategies to overcome those obstacles.

For example:
Instead of saying, “You need to train three times a week,” try asking,
“What would make training three times a week realistic for you?”
 This simple shift invites clients to reflect, problem-solve, and commit to a plan they believe in.

 

Practical Coaching Strategies for Trainers

  1. Ask, Don’t Tell
     Use open-ended questions to spark reflection.
    “What challenges do you face with meal planning?”
    “How do you feel after completing that workout?”
  2. Listen Actively
     Pay attention to tone, body language, and what’s left unsaid. Active listening builds trust and helps you tailor your approach.
  3. Educate, Don’t Dictate
     Explain the reasoning behind your recommendations. When clients understand the ‘why’, they’re more likely to buy in.
  4. Set Collaborative Goals
     Work together to define objectives that align with their lifestyle and values. This creates ownership and accountability.
  5. Celebrate Autonomy
     Encourage clients to make decisions and adapt plans when needed. Praise their initiative, it reinforces confidence.

 

Common Pitfalls to Avoid

  • Overloading Clients with Instructions
     Too many directives can overwhelm and discourage. Keep it simple and focused.
  • Ignoring Individual Preferences
     Coaching means tailoring your approach. Avoid one-size-fits-all solutions.
  • Failing to Follow Up
     Coaching is an ongoing process. Regular check-ins help clients stay engaged and supported.

 

Coaching is about empowerment, not control. By shifting from telling to coaching, you help clients build the skills, confidence, and mindset needed for sustainable success. It’s not just about getting results in the gym, it’s about creating lasting change that extends into every aspect of their lives.

 

For more on similar topics LTB members can access the Coaching Cue Directory, Movement Solutions Course, Communication Series of Courses and more (drop Claire a message if you are looking for help on a particular topic or issue).

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